Education: Plinko is no way to teach!

2010
08.30

I’ve never really enjoyed school, since I also don’t equated a 4.0 with being smart. I’ve seen many who speak of how perfect their grades are, yet can’t carry a conversation on anything except what they have learned from with in the pages of a text book. I guess my train of thought is a bit outside the box. Honestly, what more can you expect from someone who’s sister always asked, “What do you think?” That was the one question my sister Lila (Lee-la, pronounced with a latino accent) would ask me, when I tried to amuse her with some new random knowledge school had instilled in me. She would not except, “because, that’s what the teacher said!” Such a response would end our talk, real fast. And no, Lila wasn’t evil. Her feelings was, that you should have a complete understanding before you go reciting what others before you have said. The upside is that once you are able to explain something in your own words, you are in a better position to learn, unlearn, or relearn, any false or misinformation. Have you ever seen a someone argue over something they learned at school and their biggest point is “that’s what the teacher or book said.”

Information is power, and that power tends to flow in one direction in the classroom! That is, from the top of the class to the bottom. Our children sit in nice uniform grid like fashion. The only analogy I can think of is The Price is Right’s, Plinko game. The teacher stands at the top and grabs their “knowledge”, the plinko chip and drops its down for all the children to process. Some get it, others don’t. This format doesn’t work if a teachers goal is to encourage critical thinking. Since you know as well as I do when that the plinko player places that chip, their aiming for the middle where the biggest prize resides, aiming straight for the middle does nothing to foster critical thinking. To inspire critical thinking one has to engage in an exchange. The issue with this is, that in order for it to work one has to be able to relinquish some control. It needs to be more like hot potato where the information is going back and fourth vs the plinko chips being dropped down the grid.

Funny thing is, that being back in school after a decade and a half off, I’m still confronted with Professor’s who play plinko with our education. I had one professor who would give us a chapter to read at home, and during class we’d read that same chapter in class. She would then proceed to ask us questions about the chapter, and I kid you not, not once did she encourage the class to use their own words, but rather, “quote THE TEXT.”

What about those who where clueless about the text to begin with! I’ll tell you what I learned, absolutely nothing. At no time, did I feel challenged, I read the first two chapters and never again looked at the book. When I voiced these concerns with the Professor, her response was, “some don’t understand the reading” which meant to her we had to re-read the text, (which many did not understand), out loud together, and this would some how clear up any misunderstanding anyone had? Really, what about just explaining the text to us in her own words, use your educational skills to help access what we were actually having trouble understanding and fill those gaps. Forgive me if I’m wrong, but I’ve always been under the impression that our text books severed as one point of reference and the Educator served as another, and not to be considered one in the same. To make matters worse this was my education professor, not some random BS class used to fill basic credit requirements. How could she honestly be teaching us the importance of engaging students when, she herself stood atop of that plinko board just dropping chips really thinking the entire class would get it.

The only benefits of using the plinko method is that the grid is set, all there is to do is drop the chips of knowledge. This system has been in practice for way to long, and while it worked wonders for the industrial age when our concern was produce qualified factory workers who followed directions, it is no longer functional for the information age, where the ability to think outside the box is an essential skill today. While things are changing and I have met many educators who encourage students to think for themselves there are still many, who rely on a dated system and feel that since it has work that it means it will continue to work.

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Morning Ride: Off the clock is MY time!

2010
08.26

I got caught in the rain earlier this week, on my way to work, and the first person that saw me responded by saying “Even when your soaked and wet you walk in with a smile.” My typical response is, “life is too short to not smile.” I have a real positive outlook on life, and refuse to let others cloud my day. The same smile I have when I walk into work is the same smile I have through out my day and is the same on my way out the door. No, my smile is not insincere, it’s actually an honest smile, since it is me at peace with myself.

I do not believe myself to be the nicest person, since I’m not! I have little patience for dealing with those who claim ignorance time and time and again, or those who talk down to others who are not even their subordinates(I’m not saying that’s it’s okay to talk down to subordinates, but it happens). I do understand that I must remain civil with all, whom I may have to deal with directly and indirectly. So my smile and overall demeanor at work and in everyday tends to be happy. Just because I may smile with you at work doesn’t mean we’re buddies and you’ll be invite into my next poker night.

See, at work at one and time or another we’ve talked about going out after work, for some food and drinks, nothing formal just Happy hour. You know in every job there are those who always say yeah, let’s do it, but seen to be the hollywood hangout type. The Hollywood Hangout is that old friend you see in the street and chat for a few minutes only to end up saying, “let’s hang out, call me”, yet when you walk away you realize you don’t have their number. Well I’m not like that, if I tell you we should get together then I’m going to organize it! I don’t do hollywood hangouts. If I never ask you how your weekend was, chances are that, I don’t care, nor we will be hanging out.

So I decide that to see if every one well almost everyone wanted to go out for happy hour. Over all I have some really cool co-workers, as is in life, nothing is perfect so there is one person who I just DO NOT click with, so one I didn’t attempt to invite the person. I invited my immediate co-workers, my fellow teachers, of which, this person is not. Ohh something else I don’t do, invite people and hope they say no, so I look like a nice guy for asking. Nope that is not me. I also stated that if the person where to show up I’d be excusing myself. I was told that, “that’s not nice”, and “how can you do that?” My reply was simple I’m on my time and what I choose to do on my time is after all, is my time, and that includes who I hangout with!

What makes the, situation, well it’s really not a situation, but what makes it funny is that, I’m not the only one who rather the person not go, I’m just the only one who will not only say it but not beat around the bush about it!

One of my pet peeves is people who are totally blinded to facts that surround them. If you as a person do not understand that there is a cause and effect for everything you do, and the negative aura that follows you is your doing, then I can’t honestly deal with you. I will say, I’ve had some wonderful work relationships with people, who to this day I would never spend my personal time with!

Have you ever worked with someone who believed everyone like them when in reality, most would rather avoid them?

Would you invite someone after work who you did not share any interest in getting to know?

How would you handle the situation?

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THE WIFE

2010
08.18

Some people wonder if THE WIFE actually exist, and if so what name did she go by prior to marriage, since they have never heard me utter anything except “THE WIFE”.

To be honest I could tell you what her actual birth certificate says, but in the most extreme case,I’d be putting my physical health at risk, or at least setting myself up for an adult time out (sleeping on the sofa) which at the moment neither one of those options sits well with me. I will tell you what she was referred to prior to the marriage. She was “Big Head”. See she’s like the evil drug lord in those movies, the ones that no one except God gets to have breakfast with. If you have business to tend to with them there’s always some sort of middle man that’s never seen them as well. Well that’s THE WIFE, when it comes to social media, it’s just not her thing. So the same way I never refer to my SLMB by name THE WIFE also will not be mentioned by name. Plus, she refers to me as “HUSBAND”. Those who have actually met my wife know her by name.

Today happens to be the day see was born. I attempted to have her name written in the sky expressing my love for her, but, that’s just not happening in Manhattan. Also, thought her seeing her name in lights in Times Square would make her smile, but the closes thing to that would be the six o’clock news, which leans more to shocking and entertainment! So I decided a post would suffice and the best things it’s FREE! LOVE you Sweety!

The following is highly classified!

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2,920 Days in

2010
08.18

Okay, this past weekend my son completed his first eight years. While nothing has changed with him over night, I do realize he’s no where close to the lil baby that was born 2,920 days ago, on Wednesday, August 14th, 2002.

The only real reason I remember the actual day of the week is that I had purposely taken that day off. Work was getting to me, so I requested HUMP day as a personal day, to shorten my week. The plan was to relax at home and do nothing, but watch TV and be online. Can you believe I had dial-up internet service and HD meant Hard drive, which had nothing to do with TV. Hey, I even had a flip phone, matter of fact it was a nextel, with no camera, and texting cost an arm and a leg then so they were rationalized. So in the past TWO THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED TWENTY days many things have changed.

My little man is on his way to third grade, and it amazes, me and THE WIFE, with how self sufficient he is, better said can be at times. Nothing neater than walking by the kitchen to see him getting himself some ice cream on his own accord. His typical response is “I’m just getting a snack to eat while I watch a movie”. He’s funny when he ask to play the video games, and we ask him how much time he has left. He stands there calculating, how much time, and how many days left in the week he has left. To finally decide that, he really doesn’t want to play. Yes, my son has a specific amount of video game time each week! So if he uses all it all in one day he can not play til the following week!

I wonder where the time is going, cause to me it seems like it was just yesterday when we brought home this little ity, bity little thing. He wore Newborn diapers, that fit like they were two sizes to big for him. At times I find myself staring at him, only to realize he’s my son, and the choices I make will impact him in so many ways. Then I question if I’ve made the right choices by him! I’ll never know 100%, if every choice I’ve made in these past 2,920 days were right, but I do know that they were made with him in mind, and so will the next 2,920 days when he celebrates 16, and the every day after that as well!

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What’s the Rush!

2010
08.09

About a week ago my wife was out with our son. They were getting on the bus, when the driver informed her she would have to start paying for him as well. Granted he’s seven and about to turn eight, so its not like what the bus driver said was wrong or mean, we’ve just been lucky since my lil man isn’t the tallest, though he has started to sprout a bit this summer. This also happens to be the same time I find myself looking more and more at him. No longer does he have his baby features, as he starts looking more and more like a little young man.

Fast forward to this past weekend. I’m at a BBQ out in Jersey, it’s after sunset and the kids unable to run around, and are inside flipping through channels. When I walk in, my son is the one with the remote, he happens to stop at The Family Guy, which I tell him, that he knows he shouldn’t be watching that! One of the BBQ’s participants remarks something to the effect of “You don’t let him watch Family Guy, my son watches it, I don’t believe in sheltering him!” I responded by saying that “I don’t really shelter my son from life, and some shows are just not appropriate for kids”. This was not a question on the proper method of rearing a child, or some personal attack on me, so I kept it moving.

See, between me and my wife, she is the one that I would say shelters him. While I’m a bit open to letting him watch certain movies, shows, and cartoons she isn’t. I grew up watching adults, who while they didn’t sit around cursing, talking about drug, murder and mayhem, they did have ADULT conversations. When the discussions were deemed to much for the little ones I was sent away, though while we were there it did not give us the right to partake in what ever talks were happening. This is sort of my outlook with my lil man. I won’t run him off right before having a discussion, or watching a show, but will ask him to take a leave if the subject is something I believe to be to charged for him. This does not only apply to sex, murder, and mayhem but include race, religion, politics. I want my son to be a well rounded, but when it comes to cartoons like The Cleveland Show, Family Guy, and American Dad there’s just too much going on.

Do I feel like I’m sheltering my child at times? Nope, its never has it crossed my mind. My child is growing fast. Faster than I expected, so I will not expose him to what I deem, adult context. While I want him to grow up, I am in no rush for him to get over his childhood, since he will spend much more of his life as an adult.

So parents, how do you feel? Are shows like Family Guy, The Cleveland show, and American Dad cartoons appropriate for your kids? Is there a difference between cartoons and say an actual movie with the same themes? How do you decide if your child is ready or not for “adult context”?

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Experience…

2010
07.29

I’m happy to be in the education business, I think there’s so much going on!   I attribute this feeling in part, to those I follow on twitter, yall make it easy.  And, while many educators are on summer vacation, there is still no shortage of education chat and discussions going on!  Which is great for me since, my toddler school year runs year round(at least for now anyway).  It’s like having a 365/24/7 tech support.

This, being my first year in a classroom to call my own is turning out to be pretty cool, though it is not without its moments where I feel lost, but during that those time I step back and take time to readjust my focus. When I’m not rummaging through twitter to find info, I find myself digging into my bag of life experiences to help me in the classroom. So let me give you a rundown.

Its been, just over a month, in the classroom.  I myself am not the most structured person.  In retail management, I learned quickly that, when dealing with staff and groups in general, nothing will give you faster results than structure, aka “Classroom Management”.  It has help curb and alleviate unwanted behaviors, help some of the students open up, and has made it easier to get to know the kids on their own terms.

Another way we (its two teacher in each class) started was with the class set up.  Since everything was brand new we initially had tons of toys out, but ended putting lots of it away(before the kids came), since it would have just overwhelmed them and would have been counter productive.  The drop off was the next, and possibly the biggest challenge we tackled.  Time was and is still spent talking with every parent, every morning asking them questions and vice versa.  We Listened to their concerns and addressed them ASAP.  Personally, nothing for me is more upsetting, than when I as a parent have a concern about my child and am being made felt that, one, I am just not that important, or, two, that for some reason am totally unaware of who my child is.  That is when I have an issue.  So none of my kids parent are to ever have those feelings.  The drop and the pick up was a very emotional time for both the parents and the kids, sometimes the parent have bigger issues than the children. Though there may be an occasional fallout, things are improving daily .  Since both would go through separation anxieties.  No parent, in the class is to sneak out, I tell them to always,” say good by, see you later”, and tell the child who’s picking up them up.  I’d rather a child cry for five minutes when the parent leaves than to go crazy when they find out the PARENT(s) are GONE. That is a horrible feeling to go through, I it takes a child longer to settle in and open up.

I’m currently in the process of putting together our first classroom newsletter, which I’ll share on here when its done. I’m always searching for any and all types of information I can share with parents. I currently have a binder full of articles that I plan on sharing with my parents on a weekly basis. This binder is being filled with any and everything that I feel may benefit the parents, and in turn benefit our children. The articles range from the importance of parents reading to understanding behavior. Feel free, and leave me a comment or shout me an email with links to resources, I can share with my parents. Also looking for fun ways to take my science area up a notch, just remember my kids are two year old’s .

So while, I may just be getting into education in my mid 30′s, I am not late, but rather right on time.

Check these other posts out

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One last lesson….

2010
07.28

This is my first ever blog post or blog writing, whatever you call it. It actually took me some time to figure out exactly what I wanted to write about. In the scope of things it is kind of a daunting task to have what I would consider my friends, homies, peoples, fam see the real me, void of all safeguards exposed…. So, what have I have chosen to write about? Easy my moms, and the lesson she has taught me even after she has passed…

Two years ago I lost my mother, what at the time was the hardest thing I had ever lived through has become a never ending nightmare. As the days pass by I don’t know if it’s a result of me finally coming to terms or me just pushing it to the back of mind. But none the less I feel like a part of me is slowly dying.

I’ve tried to actually talk about it with some close friends but it becomes hard. Then you have to know that talking about death is a convo no one really wants to have. So no matter what you were doing when you bring that subject up it pretty much fucks up your day or evening depending on when you bring up the subject.

So what did I do? I spent 100 bucks an hour to talk to a complete stranger who was wearing a Mr.Rogers sweater writing in his pad “this Rican here needs to man the fuck up”. I don’t know about you guys but I could use those 100 bucks to buy me a nice bottle of scotch and drown my sorrows. **bbm thumbs up** so that didn’t last long.

So what options was I left with? I felt like I couldn’t talk to my friends because no one wants to be that “emo” friend. I sure as hell don’t want Mr. rogers laughing at me so I bottled it up. I learn to not talk about it. I smoked a shit ton of weed in hopes of not being able to remember anything when I woke up. Of course none of that worked. In the end I was  forced to remember the good and the bad times, forced to shed the tears. I laid awake night after night asking why me? Why now? Why can’t the pain stop.

In the end I’ll never have my questions answered. I honestly don’t think I want to know the answers at this point. I’ve learned that slowly but surely the pain subsides. The regret of not being the perfect son will never go away. But I don’t think that’s a bad thing. People will argue different but in my eyes I view it as something to strive for. To be someone my Mother could be proud of “the perfect son”.

I slowly start to remember times I spent with her. Conversations I had with her. All things that at first hurt me so much to remember now heal the wound. In the end what I have learned from my past two years of grieving is that there is no “right way” to do it. Just as long as I don’t give up there is no wrong way to grief. SURE, people will tell you a hundred million things, but in the end you have to do what is right for you. That’s the most valuable lesson I can take away from all this. So I look up to the sky and thank her for giving me the most painful but helpful lesson I can ever have in my life, “Just do you”.  I love and miss her more than words can express….. Thanks mom.

-Jabba

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…Friends?

2010
07.28
About a week or so ago one of my twitter peoples @carolynedgar posted a link to a piece she did on her blog which you can find here.  The piece in question was about friendships.  She goes on to reflect upon two friendships in particular.
…my two closest friendships, both spanning nearly 20 years, ended within months of each other.  And I still haven’t quite gotten over it.

She goes on speaks of how and why they have changed from what they once was to what it is now.  She gives her take on the reasoning of why, and how it has affected her as well as them.

While I could discuss the differences between males and females in terms of friendship, I think that would be a disservice to her post, which is her personal reflections.  Rather, I will write my thoughts and experiences as far as friendships.

At thirty-fours years young, I believe I’ve come to have a decent view of those in my immediate surroundings.  As for true friends, I think if I lost a few digits, I’d still be able to count them on that same hand.  I can say, I do have several people that I’ve known for twenty plus years, who I consider to be friends of sorts, but true blue friends, I’m not sure.

My personal take on friends, is they’re like, life!  Constantly changing, and if life changes, why not friends.  So for me, I don’t see twenty year long friendship as a reality in ones early years.  I think it’s just almost impossible, for the same reason getting married at nineteen is, in this day and age.

My reasoning is that, for any relationship whether friendship or marriage to work one has to know one’s self.  Just imagine the difference of opinions one goes through between the four years of high school, or college.  How bout after studying abroad, or something as simple as moving to another neighborhood.  These are all life-changing, life-learning experiences which change us, and how often do we take the journey with the same person, and would two people grow in the same manner?  Don’t take this as me saying that friendships are worthless I just see them as over rated.  Sort of like some of the people on craigslist trying to charge you more than what they paid for and item, because they took good care of it and it’s special to them.

Some say, I’m not an emotional person, and see friends as disposables.  That is far from the truth.  Its just that people tend to hold on to things for our own personal, selfish reasons, just look around.  People keep friends because there safer than finding new ones. Like the people on craigslist over pricing items, we tend to give our friends more importance than they really are really worth.  I’ve had many friends who I no longer keep contact with.  The reason is that, I have changed and too they have changed.  It’s not that they are not good or that I’m not good. Its just we’re at different stages, we are at the end of the day on our own  journeys that just happen to have crossed paths.  Accepting that makes it easier to not only find friends but maintain them.  This goes into knowing yourself as a person, sometimes keeping a friendship can more disservice, so the best thing is to do is let them go!

I guess, I see friends like photos. Memories of times past, some good others bad. Even though I may not be in every photo, they are all a reflection of “ME”, at a specific point in time. I can always pull out the mental box of photos and re-experience those moments, that have lead to the person who now stands before the mirror every morning!

My mental photo box: Some of these people I haven’t seen nor spoken in ages, others I still keep in touch with, but all have touched me and have personally help me in my Life’s Journey in some way.

To David James,
the first kid to friend me when I started PS 124, way back in 1980. We shared all the same class all the way up into Junior High, he treated me like a little brother, and never let me sit in the back of the classroom, helping to keep me out of trouble!

To Oscar Jones
Who like DJ, I spent my elementary school years together. Who would call from time to time. One day after hanging up, he showed up at my door five minutes later, just to hang out and chill. My moms had just suffered a stroke, and I was going through the emotions. Not once did he mention it, he just hung out and chatted, giving me a mental break! Thanks, I really needed it!

To
Elizabeth Rodriguez,
Who is my first official, unofficial little sister. One of the first people I shared that I was adopted with, and having her own person adoption story, was the only person for a long time I felt could have any idea of how I felt. She also screamed at me when she found out I was alone for the weekend and all I had to eat the entire weekend was eggs and cereal (this was before I learned how to get down in the kitchen). Told me if I never had issues in the kitchen to give her call!

So be sure to check out the linked story by @carolynedgar and tell me your thoughts on friendships!

Share a mental photo of one of your dearest friends.

I’ll end this post with quote used by my moms often…
“Don’t tell me who you are, tell me who your friends are , and I’ll tell you who you are!”

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When Changing Diapers, Are We Equal?

2010
07.15

When it comes to changing Diapers it seems to me that we  are not all created equal.  This I guess isn’t spoken much, since honestly it seems that 98.8% of infant, toddler teachers and educators in the classroom are women.

For those unaware, I have my first job as an educator (“teacher” for some, though I feel that word is dated and not indicative of what really goes on, in a functional classroom).  I am, one of two teachers in a classroom with eight toddlers.  I am also happen to be a male, if you haven’t noticed yet.  Which depending on who you ask is a good thing, but to others not so good!  This becomes apparent when the question of diapering arises.  ”Who will be changing MY DAUGHTER?”,(As the question is uttered all eyes turn to me!).  Never have I felt so out of place and unwanted before.

It seems that while the sexual revolution has managed to change most work places, it has yet touch the wonderful world of early child care.  Don’t say it has, just look at the local day care.  One would think men can only work with children in education only when the child is able to read and write.  If, Men have to change diapers then its the boys and not the girls we must change.

Why is that so?  What is truly wrong with changing a “SOILED” child, whether it be boy or girl?  Isn’t the objective to care for that child safety and well being?  What is really the rationale for it?  I have my own thoughts and ideas!  For some it’s a cultural thing, that’s it’s a women’s job, not a man’s, and only IF no other options are available, then, can men change a girls diaper.  There is also the sexual aspect of a guy changing a girls diaper, but can’t the same argument be posed for women changing boys.  I can tell you stories of women who have open their child’s diaper,only to find little Johnny with an erection, and not know how to deal with it.  Yes, our little boys get erections.  Truth be told, children in diapers have no concept of sexual differences, these are adults concepts which they will eventually learn, from US!  Are we already teaching them that while we may be separate we’re not equal? If so, can this be considered sexism, I’m just saying!

Do realize, for children it has nothing to do with sex, ask your child’s pediatrician, you’ll also be surprised to find out our little babies masturbate as well and that goes for both boys and girls.  To them it soothing, just not the way we think of masturbation as adults.

So, Do you think there’s something wrong with a guy changing a diaper at home and or in a classroom environment?  If so, why?

Would you be okay if your wonderful daughter walked around for an hour before someone changed her potty soiled diaper, all because the male teacher was the only one around and waited for a female, for fear of being seen as some sort of deviant?

After thought:
I was born in the 70′s and my first real male teacher outside of gym wasn’t until Jr high school, and my first male BLACK/LATINO happen until college. Would you say that’s part of the reason, there are so few men in early education, lack of role models!  I for one NEVER really intended to work with the toddler age group, my plan was to work with second graders, yet I found myself with a wonderful opportunity to make a difference, but now I am subjected to thoughts and opinions based on tired old thoughts that go back to battle of the sexes!

So with that said please share your thoughts, and feeling on the matter! And don’t forget to pass this one along.

Small update:
This post was create to start a discussion, which a fellow twitter follower took to his site to express his thoughts. This is a small excerpt of his thoughts.

…going to talk as a parent in the first place and as an educator after. I have a daughter, 22 years now, and when she was little, I was the one who loved to change diapers…

…We need to trust our educators, as we trust our babysitter, or a neighbor or any relative looking after our kids.


So do be sure to check out his site here, and you can also follow him on twitter here, where is your and educator or a parent, I assure you, you’ll find a wealth of information from.

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The Office: Business as Usual

2010
07.10

I was in the middle of switching phones, and while ensuring everything transfered over I found a picture of my new office space and realized , I haven’t taken the time to formally show you my new digs.  I’m talking about my office. To be frank, it’s a pretty freaking sweet looking office space. The only real downside is I must share it with my business partner, but with its size that’s not much an issue.

The cool thing is, me and my business partner both have an understanding, which is, its about the bottom line.  As long as we focus on the bottom line everything will fall into place. We’re both fully aware that we don’t side track for anything, we are always constantly in search for information, to share with our staff. Our office can get a little hectic with eight juniors running around. Things are happening at fast and furious pace , at times we may feel like we work for our Juniors.

To those who only peak into my office space, it can seem like either the longest party or the most dysfunctional office, but I kid you not, we are working on dead lines that must be met. Failure is not an option! There’s no pushing one issue a side in favor of another. Nope, we don’t pick our battles since that is not a luxury we are afforded.  All battles are to be met head on and won, simple as that. Our job is to ensure that each junior is given the tools since they will be with us for just one year, before moving up.

We are always accessing ourselves, what we are doing, whether or not it’s working for our juniors, if so, can we do it better, if not, what must me do to.  All the while not forgetting that as we access them we must access ourselves as well.  We do have a outline, but it’s not set in stone since each junior is an individual and may be at a different place of their personal growth.  Our focus is to make sure they are treated as such, and each is to receive what they need.  It’s hard to focus on all eight at times but that’s the challenge we were well aware of before taking the position.

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